Could I submit for consideration that what we need is not a new “purity culture” but perhaps a recommitment to “chastity culture”? ISTM the latter speaks more directly and consistently to the active stewarding of our bodies in love of God and others within the life of discipleship. The telos being gospel compelled faithfulness rather than purity in and of itself. It also applies equally to all Christians whether young or old, single or married, male or female in a way that “purity culture” struggles too (perhaps especially because of its history).
I’m open to this argument, but I am skeptical that a change in terminology really means a change in mindset for most people. Can you lay out more specifically how “chastity” might cover ground that “purity” misses?
Yep. It's been used for ages. I wonder if the hangup with the term chastity, in many evangelical minds, is that is is highly connected to Catholic teaching and sexual restraint, even in marriage. Which is not anything purity culture ever endorsed or even hinted at.
But seriously, I take the point. It’s not so much the specific term chastity that appeals to me, but the fact that (properly understood) it refers to a proactive expression of discipleship lived in response to the gospel (rather than veering into legalism which I think is a danger with the term “purity”). Ultimately I think what we want to advocate for is the faithful stewarding our sexual natures . So whatever term refers to that 🙂
I'm a mother is six who raised kids during this time. I wanted for my children a better experience than I had - - to come into marriage without the shame and heartbreak of sexual relationships I had before I was mature. These adult children are more or less critical of our parenting in this regard, and we were by no means extreme in it. We never made purity the most important thing. Your thoughts remind me of the context of that 'movement' and the sound grounding of the Word. I feel like I don't need to be ashamed any more for 'putting my kids through' the gentle teaching that God cares about our sexual well-being. Thank you for this.
This is really good. I think your point about lifting marriage is key here. I was raised in the peak of purity culture and had several friends in late HS/early college who would have liked to get married but couldn't because the adults in their life highly discouraged it so they wouldn't throw away their future.
A new purity or chastity culture needs parents to and Christian institutions to buy into marriage. Parents should be ok with kids getting married younger and make spaces in their home for their married kids to live and get on their feet. They should also be more open to continuing to pay for college while (if they are choosing to) their kids are married for a few years. Christian universities should have more than just married housing, but find ways for married couples to flourish while they are students there. We shouldn't live like we're worried that marriage is going to make the process of being a professional harder, but instead see it as adding a great good to someone's life (not an ultimate good!).
Good news is that I've seen parents do this and I've seen churches and parents generally do a good job of teaching about sex and lifting up marriage.
Could I submit for consideration that what we need is not a new “purity culture” but perhaps a recommitment to “chastity culture”? ISTM the latter speaks more directly and consistently to the active stewarding of our bodies in love of God and others within the life of discipleship. The telos being gospel compelled faithfulness rather than purity in and of itself. It also applies equally to all Christians whether young or old, single or married, male or female in a way that “purity culture” struggles too (perhaps especially because of its history).
I’m open to this argument, but I am skeptical that a change in terminology really means a change in mindset for most people. Can you lay out more specifically how “chastity” might cover ground that “purity” misses?
Yep. It's been used for ages. I wonder if the hangup with the term chastity, in many evangelical minds, is that is is highly connected to Catholic teaching and sexual restraint, even in marriage. Which is not anything purity culture ever endorsed or even hinted at.
Make chastity great again? 😉
But seriously, I take the point. It’s not so much the specific term chastity that appeals to me, but the fact that (properly understood) it refers to a proactive expression of discipleship lived in response to the gospel (rather than veering into legalism which I think is a danger with the term “purity”). Ultimately I think what we want to advocate for is the faithful stewarding our sexual natures . So whatever term refers to that 🙂
Agree, it is the basis of much of my substack. :)
I'm a mother is six who raised kids during this time. I wanted for my children a better experience than I had - - to come into marriage without the shame and heartbreak of sexual relationships I had before I was mature. These adult children are more or less critical of our parenting in this regard, and we were by no means extreme in it. We never made purity the most important thing. Your thoughts remind me of the context of that 'movement' and the sound grounding of the Word. I feel like I don't need to be ashamed any more for 'putting my kids through' the gentle teaching that God cares about our sexual well-being. Thank you for this.
This is really good. I think your point about lifting marriage is key here. I was raised in the peak of purity culture and had several friends in late HS/early college who would have liked to get married but couldn't because the adults in their life highly discouraged it so they wouldn't throw away their future.
A new purity or chastity culture needs parents to and Christian institutions to buy into marriage. Parents should be ok with kids getting married younger and make spaces in their home for their married kids to live and get on their feet. They should also be more open to continuing to pay for college while (if they are choosing to) their kids are married for a few years. Christian universities should have more than just married housing, but find ways for married couples to flourish while they are students there. We shouldn't live like we're worried that marriage is going to make the process of being a professional harder, but instead see it as adding a great good to someone's life (not an ultimate good!).
Good news is that I've seen parents do this and I've seen churches and parents generally do a good job of teaching about sex and lifting up marriage.